Slippery Crime at Burbank Costco

February 7th, 2013 · No Comments

Or not.  So, if you were going to steal some motor oil, how much do you think you could hide on your person at one time?  Two containers?  Maybe four?  How about ten?  Would that be too many, do you think?  I’m thinking anything more than a couple and you are going to be looking pretty bulky and odd, in that I’ve-got-hidden-rectangular-plastic-containers-in-my-trousers kind of way.  Right?  Well, if you’re a California man, you think that 24 is the exact right number.  Only, turns out you’re wrong.  Really, really, wrong.  This is such an absurd crime, that I just had to post about it.

Last week, a California man was caught leaving Costco without paying for 24 containers of motor oil which he had strapped to his body with bungee cords and stuffed in his clothing.  You can see how it might have been easy to spot this, can’t you?  What is really amazing is that he was chased by Costco employees but escaped by jumping over a fence.  I am impressed that with 24 quarts of motor oil on his person, he could still scramble over a fence.  Although, he did apparently lose nine quarts of the oil as he ran from the Costco employees.  But still, 15 quarts strapped to you would seem to make it hard to get over a fence as well, since that is like dragging around an extra 12 pounds or so.  Eventually, as you might have guessed, he was apprehended by police.  All of the witnesses thought he had an odd gait, one of the witnesses had this to say:

Manuel Atlas said, “He looked kind of heavy and out of shape.”

Yes, I would think so.  Surprisingly, it is quite hard to look graceful when you are carting around that much extra weight in bulky containers strapped to your body.  Who’d have thought?

Apparently, when police apprehended the man, he was having troubling breathing from having the bungee cords around him and the pressure of the quarts of oil against his chest.  So, it turns out that the man changes oil for a living and decided that stealing the oil from Costco was a more cost effective business model.  He also had an additional 50 quarts of motor oil in his car; police are investigating where that came from.


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